LM Montgomery on birth, scheduling/cry it out and nursing...1912-1913
I've been re-reading (for the 3rd time, I believe!) the fascinating journals of L.M. Montgomery. In particular, I've been reading Volume 2 (1910-1921), during which time her grandmother passed away and she married her husband and became a mother. I first read her journals as a newlywed myself- I actually bought them while on my honeymoon on PEI!
A friend of mine, TulipGirl, once commented that she found some of Montgomery's books encouraging to read as a mother. I would tend to agree! It's fascinating to read Montgomery's journal describing her views and experiences with three "hot-button"mothering issues, birth, scheduling/cry-it-out and breastfeeding. As a fairly well-educated and progressive woman, I'm sure that she was influenced in large degree by the emerging "scientific" literature on birth and child care. At the same time, she writes beautifuly of those mothering instincts that sometimes fly contrary to what we are told we should or should not do by "experts."
As someone who had a manageable birth, pain-wise, with my second child because I chose waterbirth, I found this passage describing her first son's birth to be fascinating. I'm wondering how similar what she read is to the Hypnobabies course (which I haven't seen) or Grantly Dick-Read's work.
Some rather long quotes here...
"I have heard much of the agony of the birth chamber. That such agony is the rule rather than the exception generations of suffering women have testified since the dawn of time. But I know no more of it then I did before my child's birth. From first to last I had no severe pain. I have suffered more many a night with tooth-ache. If I knew I was to have another baby tomorrow it would not worry me in the least, as far as the ordeal itself goes. I felt nothing but cramp-like aches in the back and had it not been for the dreadful stifling heat and several hard and exhaustive attacks of vomiting I would not have minded it much at all. Dr. Bascom said he could not understand it. He said it was perfectly marvellous, in a woman of my age, at a first birth, and with a child having such a large firm head.
Ever since I knew I was to have a child I persistently took, every day, a set of exercises recommended in a medical book for pregnant women. These exercises were said to affect all the muscles used in partuition, making them flexible and elastic. Perhaps it was because of this I suffered so little. Personally, I have another opinion but I do not tell it to all and sundry.
A few years ago I read Hudson's 'Law of Psychic Phenomena'. Ever since I have had a strong belief in the power which the subconscious mind can exert over physical functions. Every night, as I was dropping off to sleep, and frequently through the day I repeated over and over the command to my subconscious mind 'Make my child strong and healthy in mind and body and make his birth safe and painless for me'.
Well, his birth was safe and almost painless fo rme and whatever he may develop into he is certainly strong and healthy now. I believe it was the 'psychic suggestion' which produced my 'easy time'. but it may have been the exercises- or both- or neither. It is one of the things that can't be proved, believe what we will."
(Vol. 2, pp 100-101)
Montogmery on her own experience with scheduling her baby, allowing him to cry, or not...
"...I cuddled him in my arms and tucked him away in his basket and cosied the blankets and down puff about him. It is so lovely to make him warm and comfortable and happy. The very hardest thing I have to do is sometimes to steel my heart against him when he should be asleep. I just have to hold on to myself to keep from rushing to him. and I sit there in misery and harrow my soul by thinking, 'What--if--he were to--if anything should happen to him ever--I would be haunted to my death by the agonizing thought that I had let him cry his poor wee heart out without consoling him.' And I see myself lying alone at night thinking of the little creature far away from me in his grave and his little basket empty--and the horror is often so great that I fly to him, rules and regulations to the contrary not withstanding, and catch him up and cuddle him against my breast, with his darling head nestled on my shoulder. And then the sweet baby smiles and the blue eyes laughing through the tears!"
(p.111)
Finally on nursing and weaning, and this makes me thankful for today's nursing bras and fashion styles! (She weaned him entirely by 10-11 months, if my calculations are correct...)
"But for me another of the little tragedies of motherhood took place today. I gave my little son his first meal of milk-- the beginning of his weaning. I felt it bitterly. From his birth he has been wholly dependent on me. He has drawn all the sustenance his darling wee body demanded from me--he has been mine, wholly mine. But henceforth this is not to be so. He is beginning to owe his nourishment to an outside source and must continue to do so more and more. In one way it will be, I suppose, a relief. Certainly there are some aspects in which nursing is a nuisance, especially when one lives in an epoch of fashion which ordains dresses hooked in the back. But I hate to give it up. I am so thankful I have been able to nurse my baby and I cannot understand how any mother can refuse to do so if she is able. Yes, today it gave me a pang when I gave my wee man his cup of milk."
(p.117)
